Friday, April 17, 2015

A & B conversation

Conversations always seem to be taken in first, second and third person, never just first and second. Why? No real friends or loyalty. Well people also have a tendency to want either closure, clarity or convincing. Closure by just leaving the situation and individual alone, clarity to figure out how to handle the situation from someone elses point of view or convincing to even say anything at all. Still confused? So am I!! If this is your friend and you feel in your heart that something needs to be said and what needs to be said...then why ask ANYBODY else for their opinion. I honestly will ask to compare or just to vent out my feelings but never do what anybody tells me I should do. Wish everybody was like this but we know how that goes. But what happens if it was a private conversation? You know about your personal problems and you felt you have a good friend, why not talk about it and see what she thinks. Time goes by and everybody knows your business!! Really? So you go back to the source.

Scenario:
  1. Susan: Hey girl, I wanted to run something by you when you got a chance about the other day. I didn’t bring it up because we were in the eyes and ears of other people and wanted to keep it private.
  2. Sky: Sure girl, wassup?
    A. Well you remember when you said something about my family drama and personal issues to diane? I did not appreciate that and felt that was spoken between me and you. If I wanted diane to know, I would have told her myself but felt I could talk to you and figured you would keep it to yourself.
    B. Well I apologize about that. Figured everybody has issues and didn’t think it would a big deal because we all were friends.
  1. Understandable but please don’t do that again. I know she has a big mouth sometimes and know I can’t go to her about everything!
  2. I get it because I can be the same way. It won’t happen again!

Everything seems cool and it seems Sky understood until D, E and F heard multiple stories about what happened and how Sky REALLY felt. Come to find out:
-your family is crazy
-they do nothing for you
-you’re petty
-always have something going on or to complain about
-she didn’t think it was a big deal because everybody has family issues so why is yours sooo important to keep quiet about?
-your aunty such and such on welfare and wic, etc, etc...

Wow! So much for having someone to talk to right? I have learned over the years and still learning actually that everybody is NOT a friend and change like the weather! They often fake the funk and put on these faces to know your business. Sky and Susan are no longer friends of course and thats when Sky really ran her mouth about Susans life and she felt. Smh. Crazy but women or females are just petty like that. Let bygones be bygones and just move on. No need for the extra stuff. How can you put down someone you considered a friend so bad that it ruins your friendship? And why would you want to? I have learned that A LOT of women carry insecurities and bring them into their relationships and not just with men. Sad thing is putting another “sister” and fellow woman down is the right thing to do when no longer cool?!? It seems that person is now beneath you and you have every right to say whatever you want. But when you guys were friends, you kept quiet and consistently expressed how you felt to others that had nothing to do with nothing...interesting. When the Susans come to you being real and honest, it’s never reciprocated and often fabricated when spoken about to others. You know who you are. Carry on.

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Friday, April 3, 2015

3 Sides...

I always believed there were 3 sides to the way a woman thinks: heart, mind, and intuition.
Heart: She will follow and be loyal and would not think the people she cares about the most would hurt her. It will be hard making a decision about a relationship or family member because of what it symbolizes to others and what they mean to her. She knows this is what makes people stay in bad situations and regret wasted time. It will still be hard letting go.
Mind: This is when she begans to talk about her problems to everyone close to her. For reassurance or closure before actually making her decision. She constantly goes over and back and fourth about things even when its the truth. Big and small details. Speaking in second and third person to describe everyones action and reaction making sure she gets a truthful response from peers. Leaving out no details but still feeling as if it was all her fault. It will be hard letting go.
Intuition: She knows exactly whats going on. Will ask questions she knows the answers to, goes on social media, figure out passwords, and may even become "cool" with people she doesn't even like just to get answers. It's like feeding a crazy appetite. She pictures what it would be like without this person and how to deal day by day. Thinking of their actions and how they made her feel is the worst. She knows she deserves better. Letting go is a piece of cake;)